Alcohol and Spirit

And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit; Ephesians 5:18

Many, many moons ago, I regularly partook in intoxicating beverages. When I drank I was making a specific choice to do activities outside my "normal" characteristics. I chose to make decisions I could then blame on the alcohol. Was I an alcoholic? Did I suffer from alcoholism? Well, in order to answer those questions I had to determine how alcoholism is defined. Here's what I found at dictionary.reference.com...

• habitual intoxication; prolonged and excessive intake of alcoholic drinks leading to a breakdown in health and an addiction to alcohol such that abrupt deprivation leads to severe withdrawal symptoms
• an intense persistent desire to drink alcoholic beverages to excess
• a chronic disorder characterized by dependence on alcohol, repeated excessive use of alcoholic beverages, the development of withdrawal symptoms on reducing or ceasing intake, morbidity that may include cirrhosis of the liver, and decreased ability to function socially and vocationally.

Did I need a drink when I got up? No. Did I need a drink just to make it through the day? No. Did I need a drink every day? No. Did I suffer withdrawal symptoms after stopping the intake? Mildly and only occasionally. When I examine my use in black and white it is crystal clear. I used alcohol to act like a fool, a choice I consciously made.

Augh, forgive me! I have no words to effectively express the cry of my heart at this depth of realization here.

Today, this confession carries great grief and intense sorrow. I am a wretched sinner saved only by the grace and mercy of the eternal I AM. God is so amazing. (I can't say that enough.) He loved me even when I chose to act like a fool. Christ paid for that foolishness so that it would not be beaten out of me. It was an exacting price far beyond my ability to pay. Yet, He has forgiven me. Totally. Completely.

My grief and sorrow over the choice help keep me from returning to it. However, the Spirit is the antidote. As long as I keep the Spirit fed with fervent prayer and consistent scripture intake so that my relationship with Jesus flourishes, the effects of the poison are countered.

Lord God Almighty, Gracious, Merciful, thank you for the forgiveness that You offer and for the faith to accept it. In my finite mind, I can only minimally grasp the magnitude of Your love and it overwhelms me. Hallelujah! In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

Back to School!

Yup, it's back to school time in my world. Off-spring are back in their respective schools and we've made it through the beginning of the session at work. I think I'd like the greener grass of year round school. It seems I might find it easier to keep a routine going. However, not ever having done year round school, it's only speculation at this point.

In any case, with the return of routine comes the return of blogging. God is faithful to keep me sustained in Spirit and Truth.

(Dear Lord, I pray that you will protect the teachers under your care. I thank you for the familiar routines of Autumn. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.)

Faithful and Correcting

This may seem like an odd title for a blog entry but it is very representative of my past few weeks. My body is physically tired from the stress of my job and the mental work that seems to surround every day. God has been faithful to provide a job for me. The job allows me to have a place to live, food to eat, and stuff I want. I have allowed the physical tiredness to distract me from the provision of God. Tonight, I was corrected.

Yes, God is faithful to give me what I need in the form of physical things. He is also faithful to give me what I need spiritually and mentally even when that means correcting me. Our church has a visiting evangelist this week. Tonights lesson was for me. It was all about being a mature Christian. 1. Mature Christians do not gossip. There is always an encouraging, uplifting, building message from a mature Christian. God showed me that I have some growing up to do. 2. Mature Christians see the blessings of burdens. God has been faithful to call to remembrance how the trials and burdens I've been through have been for His purpose. He's been working with me on this for some time. 3. Mature Christians know that to live IS Christ and to die is gain. God has much for me to learn here though He only gives me what I can handle each time.

(Lord God, forgive me for my loose lips, for the hurtful things I've said, for the negative tone about my church, for each time I have fallen short. Thank you for bridging the gulf between us so that I can know You. I cannot do this under my power, You alone are the power needed. I pray for that power to be evident through my life. Thank you for the salvation You have given to me. In Jesus name, I pray.)

Stonecipher

Between my house and my mother's house on the path most often taken, is an exit to "Stonecipher". When I passed this sign on our recent trip that way, I thought of the original Stone Cipher. Now you have to understand that I don't always jump at the first meaning of a word. Take cipher for instance, the first meaning of cipher is the number zero. Later meanings deal with coded methods of writing. Yes, I like the later meanings.

So, when I think of the original Stone Ciper, I think back to Moses. And he gave unto Moses, when he had made an end of communing with him upon mount Sinai, two tables of testimony, tables of stone, written with the finger of God. (Exodus 31:18) God is the One that wrote on the stone a code for us. The Key to that cipher died for the sins of the world.

(Lord God, I thank you that the message is simple and easily decoded. You loved me. You made me. You died for me. You wanted me. I accepted you. You will take me to heaven someday. Simply written. Simply perfect. You. In Jesus holy name I pray, amen.)

Information Overflow

Today has been a great day of learning. Our Sunday school lesson was from Daniel. Our pastor preached on creation for the morning service. The evening lesson was from 2 Thessalonians dealing with the end times. It was wonderful. I have much to consider and much for which I am thankful.

It was incredibly comforting knowing that God revealed himself to a worldly leader in Daniel. It was the king who saw that it was the Son of God with the 3 believers in the fire. I mused at the thought that others can see God with us during the times of the hottest trial if we rely on Him as they did. I also noted that it sometimes takes the times of trial for us to seek God's very presence in our lives and that God will bless that in accordance to His glory.

But, satan has reared his ugly head in our family. I am embarking on a study of how God views hate. What does it really mean when we speak, "I hate you"? How do those words affect God? Is this a serious offense in His eyes? If so, how serious? And finally, how can we replace those words of hate with words that are encouraging and peaceful?

(Lord God, I ask that you empower our search for Your answers on hate. I ask that you keep satan or his emissaries from meddling in our search for the truth. Build a hedge around us as we endeavor to seek Your face in this matter. Thank you for the words of encouragement in Daniel and the promise that You will never leave us. Thank you for the beautiful creation that You placed around us. Thank you for creating me in Your image and for Your purpose. Thank you that You loved me. In Jesus precious name, Amen.)

Speeding Along

During this weekend's travels I found myself speeding along the highway. I was convicted. Wow, it seems like such a small thing just a couple of miles over the speed limit - 67 in a 65. Yet, God used that to speak to me. It is rebellion. Rebellion against the governing laws. If I'm comfortable speeding along in defiance of the country's laws, am I also willing to continue on sinning in defiance of God's laws? Am I speeding along in my little sin ignoring God's call to obedience and repentance? That sin could be a continual lie, not providing all my tithe, gossip, undermining the authority of the scripture, drinking alcohol, cursing, or any number of things just barely over the speed limit. I slowed down those two miles per hour and set my cruise control. Now, I'm seeking to slow down the sneaky sin and let God be my cruise control. I love the way God shares with us when we are open to hear His voice.


(Lord God, I pray that you will reveal the speeding sin in my life. Help me to turn to You for my cruise control. I thank you for being the govenor that keeps me from running away crazily. In Jesus name, Amen.)

Absence Explained

Yes, I've been away from the blog for a couple of weeks. There have been some changes at work that required extra thought processing and that increased my stress level exponentially.

And, I was preparing for a Mother/Daughter retreat at my mother's church. Mom lives 240 miles from me. It's interesting trying to make sure I understood everything that was going on for the retreat. (I didn't.)

I'm aware that there really is no normalcy about my life. Yet, I am making time to get back to this. I distracted myself so that I might be able to enrich my relationship with both my mother and my daughter in accordance with God's desires for us. I know it was the right thing to do because Satan tried to interfere using my work. He was not successful. God did enrich my relationship with Him, Mom and Daughter.

(Dear Lord, thank you for the travel time and the retreat time with my female family members. Thank you for the ones willing to care for my male family member in my absence. I pray that I will be able to take the things that You spoke to me from the retreat and use it for Your glory alone. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.)