CHRISTmas!

Dear Lord,

Thank you for this day that our nation has set aside to celebrate as the day You were born in flesh. I pray that every person that hears the phrase Merry Christmas knows that it really is about You.

I praise You for what you did for me. This gift of salvation so freely offered but at such a great price to you. Thank you.

I love you, Lord Jesus. Amen.

Rejoicing

Mom has been doing great through the tests and today's treatment. The chemo went great today and now we will watch closely the next couple of days to make sure that nothing goes wrong.

God is so gracious to allow this time and to move Mom through each step with His strength. I am learning so much about the nature of God through this. He is so in control.

(Lord, God, I praise you for all that you do. Thank you for carrying Mom as she faces this challenge. I see your strenght even in her weakness. You are an awesome God. Thank you. In Jesus' name, amen.)

Christmas Lights

I love Christmas lights. Every single twinkling one of them reminds me of Jesus as the light of my life and the true light. I go nuts at Christmas decorating the yard and the inside of the house. I don't need the presents, the wrapping paper, or the ornaments - although I do enjoy those things also. Every once in a while, I get to combine the lights and penguins. Aren't they cute. I can NOT image Christmas without the lights. No matter the color each one of them dispells the darkness. I cling to that promise from God.

1 John 2:8: Again, a new commandment I write unto you, which thing is true in him and in you: because the darkness is past, and the true light now shineth.

I praise God that He loved me before I even knew of Him. That He sent His Son to be the light. My heart is filled to overflowing.

(Lord, I thank you so much for light. In Jesus Name, Amen.)

What comes next? Random thoughts...

We are preparing for chemotherapy around here. My brother is mad at me because I don't call exactly when he wants. I'm beginning to really struggle with maintaining my own household while caring for Mom. And, I haven't even begun the difficult part of caring for mom yet.

I hate cancer. My heart breaks when I see Mom. She's not that old. She shouldn't look like my great-grandmother. As a child I remember seeing great grandma and thinking that she was so old. I couldn't understand how she was still alive. Now, mom reminds me of that and I just hate it.

I thank God that things have worked out for her treatment. I know that she would not have been able to go through this back home. God really has something going on here, I just don't know what. I'm not scared of losing mom. I know what the future holds and I know that God holds her. That's enough.

I will admit though that I don't know that I have the strength to get through all this. My heart desires a physical presence to lean on through this. I admit that I envy others in relationships where when they are caught up in a sad moment, they turn to their spouse and rest there. I desire that.

(Lord, I turn these desires over to you. Please carry them for me. Thank you. In Jesus name, amen.)

Cancer = Caretaker

Well, it's official. My mother has cancer. And God is calling me to be her care giver while she undergoes treatment. Please pray for me. I must rely totally on God for this ability as it is not something that comes to me naturally.

Every cancer is different. Every treatment is different. While there may be some similiarities in the way the cancer presents and is treated, ultimately each one is unique. When dealing with cancer and cancer treatment, the way it's approached is as unique as the situations.

The adjustment is somewhat of a shock. Yet, I don't think there is anything different I can do. Mom is living with me for awhile. God knows if it's going to be for a long period or no. There's so much that I want to do but I don't want to overdo. I pray that God gives me the strength to do as He desires through all this. He has a reason. I'll listen to hear what He says.

(Lord, I pray that you will wrap your love around my mother and keep her close to your heart. Thank you for this woman that has cared for me, taught me, disciplined me, and listened to me. I pray that you will keep my perspective on you through it all. My heart cries for relief for Mom, yet I seek your will. In Jesus' name, amen.)

It's Thanksgiving!!

I love Thanksgiving. I like the holiday and the time off but I really love thanks giving. I love to thank God for the many wonderful blessings that He has bestowed. I'm thankful for my health. I'm thankful for the children that God has allowed me to parent. I'm thankful for my pets. I'm thankful for Christmas lights. I'm thankful for a vehicle that runs. I'm thankful for a bathtub. I'm thankful for the Internet. I'm thankful for words. I'm thankful for the food that fills my belly. I'm thankful for pickles. I'm thankful for the wind. I'm thankful for laughter. I'm thankful for friends that surround me. I'm thankful for cinnamon. I'm thankful for being able to read. I'm so glad that God is. I'm so glad that He gives. I'm so glad that He lives!

(Dear Lord, I do thank you. Thank you for being my strong tower. Thank you for allowing me to lean on the everlasting arms. Thank you for sheltering me under your wings. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for taking the price of my sin. Thank you for not letting me know just how much that cost. But, mostly, thank you for my salvation. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.)

Thoughts of My Father

I've been thinking about my father a lot in the past few months. Since his passing in September 2006, I've often thought of him and missed him yet there seems to be something different about these thoughts. In some ways, I did not know my father well. I knew him only as my father. He was a very private man. Dad did not waste his words. He preferred spending time in the woods over spending time in the city. He provided for his family. He protected us. It is my shame that I never got to know him as a person. I hunger for that knowledge now. I want others to tell me what they knew about him.

Mostly, I want to know his relationship with Jesus. He never talked about it. I search my memories for how Dad was an example of Christ. I diligently seek to identify those characteristics from Galations 5 in his life.

(Dear Lord, thank you for the earthly father you gave me. Help me to identify Your presence in his life. Help me to make sure Your presence is evident in my life. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.)